Dear Annie: I read the letter from the woman who asked if she should invite her estranged husband back home to live with her "as a friend." 

Here's my advice: No, do not ask him back. For the sake of our two sons, I stayed in a platonic relationship like that for 17 years. Don't think you'll date while he's living there. What kind of man would get involved in that kind of situation? Eventually, you will grow to hate both him and yourself. Eventually, it will destroy your self-esteem. 

When our children were teenagers, I finally had enough and filed for divorce. I met a wonderful man, everything I ever wanted, and am sorry now for wasting all that time. I did it for the children, but now they are grown and ask, "Why did you stay so long? You and Dad have nothing in common." 

Today I am friends with my ex-husband, and the boys have a good relationship with him, but I resent all those lost years. -- Been There in Los Angeles 

Dear L.A.: Nothing speaks louder than the Voice of Experience. Of course, since all of you have such a good relationship, and you found a wonderful man, perhaps those years accomplished a little something worthwhile after all. Thanks for writing.